By Chaplain Joy Le Page Smith, MA, BCC 

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It took this pandemic for us to get a grasp of what it means to see a full face. Clearly, we know half-a-face is not enough. We feel cheated in only seeing the eyes of the person coming toward us. When a person’s eyes search for our eyes we naturally look to the person’s mouth for the rest of the message he or she may be trying to send.

We are getting more used to living with the truth that a life-threatening disease is alive among us. Time has passed and a good share of us have stepped up to trusting the vaccines. We have more of a sense of safety, now, while being around others. Yet, for some of us there is a definite discomfort when a stranger moves in “to close for comfort.”

One day, when the COVID virus is faced down by the vaccine and herd immunity truly exists, we will gain an increased appreciation for life, and for one another—especially the enjoyment of seeing the full face of others.

Ideally, we will also value the fact that life is tenuous. Not one of us knows how long we will be alive. What we can know is that “there is a God ” and there is life after this experience on earth.

Meanwhile, the most healthy way to live is extended in Scripture, “ Rejoice always,  pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you,” (1st Thessalonians 5:16-18). We can only do this through embracing the mystery that lies within life: we have no control over the fact our lives will end. And—we have no way of knowing the “when.” Some may get a medical diagnosis that says “time is short,” and old age also hands us the opportunity to “get ready to leave.” So, when Scripture tells us to “rejoice always” there is a secret in that: A built in reward of better health. A field of medicine, psychoneuroimmunology (PNI), holds research bearing this out. Studies in SPECT MRI have proven our brain makes significant changes when we pray. This indicates we were made to transcend. People who pray consistently know prayer greatly relieves the most difficult types of angst that life can bring.

God has taken care of our need for emotional help and healing. After talking with God in prayer, take some moments thinking (or journaling) about all there is for which to be thankful. Notice how you feel when you finish. Mostly, this lifts a person’s mind and emotions bringing reassurance, transcendence and empowerment to get past the hard stuff.  

Working our way through a heavy heart comes with the package of being a human who loves. Tears and talking about the despair of missing someone we formerly looked forward to seeing, hearing, touching is one of the hardest burdens we bear. Often remorse, anger and hurt bring questions that plague: “Why did this have to be!? What help is there for my loss?”

We can get depressed, particularly if we fail to feel our anguish and communicate it to loved ones who can listen. Counseling is sometimes a must. This was true for me when my close friend, many years ago, was murdered by her 14-year-old son . . . shock knocked my life apart for he was a good student, involved in sports and seemed oh-so-normal. And, then—my friend was gone! A deadly influence resulted in the tragedy of taking his mother’s life.

Time has lessened the pain, but I still hurt when this terrible memory returns, but, thankfully, I was given an opportunity to make a difference in his young life—once I could forgive him. I had to work through such a hideous thing, so unnatural and impossible to comprehend. What touches me today is knowing I will see my friend again in the eternal realms as she was a believer in our Lord Jesus. And, I will see her son again, as he chose to let Christ become master of his life after serving time in a closed treatment center.

The shortest verse in the Bible is “Jesus wept” as He came to terms with the death of His close friend, Lazarus. He, being God, raised his friend up out of death. Knowing our limits, we cannot do that very often. So we look to the Great Healer in the hour of our exceedingly painful losses. He said, “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me. For I am gentle and lowly of heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For, My yoke is easy and My burden is light,” (Matthew 11:28-30). It is the Light of Christ that will help us through our darkest moments.