By Joy Le Page Smith, M.A., Mental health counselor, Board Certified Chaplain

A child’s mental health can be detrimentally affected by their childhood experiences. Having just published The Little Mountain Goat Who Was Afraid of High Places, I think of a few simple things that can make a real difference. Remember, your child as the best investment you have in life.

·   Listen when a child speaks. Respond in a way that the child feels accepted, even if you do not like what is said. Children need to know they are cared about and accepted—even when they are wrong and need to be corrected. A smile, along with silence and words like, “We will talk more on this later,” can help during challenging moments. Feelings change quickly for children.

·   Show you value what they feel as well as what they think. A smile of reassurance is often all that is needed when a difficult feeling is revealed. Or, words such as, “What are you feeling as you tell me that?” can help. (When you smile at your child it is as if they see your heart, your love.)

·   Take their fears seriously, do all you can to make this seem a safe world to them. If a child speaks of being afraid, draw the child out. Ask, “Tell me more about that.” Or, “We are watching over you. We are not going to let that bad thing hurt you.” (You are “like God” to a young child!)

·   If “fear talk” becomes repetitive, let that be OK. Talking about fears is highly beneficial as “the telling of it” helps to disperse the feeling. It is only a feeling—and feelings come and go.

·   Keep daily news off when they are present. And, only talk about serious adult concerns when children are not present.

·   Never talk about worries over money in the presence of your child.

·   If, as adults, parents or others need to talk intensely (or argue), try to wait until a time when the child is not present. If that is not possible, reassure the child, saying, “Everything is OK. Sometimes we have to talk like this when something needs to be worked out. This talk has nothing to do with you, we love you and plan for things to go well for you.” Children are egocentric. They almost always think everything is about them, or caused by them.

·   The more love and tenderness shown in the home, the more secure a child, or children will feel.

·   Teach boundaries: what is right behavior and what is wrong behavior.

·   Ideally, introduce them to a faith experience; faith in a creator brings peace.

In the back of The Little Mountain Goat Who Was Afraid of High Places there are two pages of questions to use with the child after the story is read. These questions hold potential for meaningful interaction with your child. While using the questions, a child who is suffering secretly, may reveal a situation you will want to address and change, therefore making the child’s experience of life much better, perhaps even safer.

The Point is:

Want to help your child gain confidence in his or her abilities?

If so,

The Little Mountain Goat Who Was Afraid of High Places is the book for you and your child!

You  can purchase copies on this website homepage.