By Chaplain Joy Le Page Smith, MA
Years ago my friend Marge’s teenage son was killed while skiing with friends and classmates at Bogus Basin Ski Resort. He ran into a tree and was killed instantly.
That night after my friend received the news in her home I witnessed astounding faith.
“Tommy is with God,” she said through her tears. “He is now praying for us.”
She was suffering all the feelings of shock and unbelief that Tom could be taken from their home so suddenly, but the overriding theme flowing from Marge that night was one of trust and assurance that God would bring meaning to Tom’s death.
A Mass was scheduled the following morning at Bishop Kelly High School for a grieving student body, along with the family. Marge said, “Jim and I cannot go. But it would make me happy if you would go.”
The gymnasium was filled with students, friends and faculty. Tom had been designated “Outstanding Sophomore of the year.” He was a treasured person. That fact of his distinctive acumen was born out by more than words.
People gathered. Words were said. And, comfort came as compassion was felt. No doubt each came away with some nugget of truth. For me it was Father William Dodgson’s words: “This is a time when Tom would want you to make your faith work.”
We all grapple with the meaning of life and death–and come away like Jacob of the Old Testament, injured but blessed. We have a new appreciation for life’s essence. We find ourselves blessed in the realization that each one of us is mortal, reminded not to take people for granted.
Grief is torture. It strikes us cruelly, ripping away the peripherals, giving us a long look at our nakedness. It is human life that is at stake. Time seems to stand still while we grieve. It is a time for “verbal thinking” and “notional beliefs” to make that long journey from head to heart. Often faith is weighed in the balance and found wanting as we cry out, “Lord I believe . . . help my unbelief!”
While caught in the throes of grief sometimes we cling to God for our strength and solace and other times we throw our anger like into His face, attempting to empty ourselves of the burden. But if we refrain from turning our backs on Go—if we wait, watch and listen instead of running – we will encounter His response, the long loving gaze of a Father who also has suffered. A Father who understands.
John 14:1-2, tells us, “Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also. And where I go you know, and the way you know. ”
How wonderful are the truths of Scripture.
About the author: Joy Le page Smith, MA is a Board Certified Clinical Chaplain. Visit Healing-with-Joy.com for Joy’s blog along with many helpful articles addressing life’s difficulties. Her books and blogs are read in up to 32 countries. Her second site is at Healingwithjoy.blogspot.com