A little story told by a friend bears a poignant point.

A man, a self-proclaimed atheist stayed home by the fire on Christmas Eve while his wife attended mass. Idly, he wandered to the window and stared into the darkness, lit softly by moon and snow. A flock of birds pecked about for food around his porch.

Knowing it would be slim pickings he took some bird seed to the front door, sprinkled it about and waited. But, fear forced the birds to keep distance.

Back inside, the man went again to the window. He thought, “Maybe I could sprinkle seed in the garage and open the door. With the light on, they might see the seed, enter, eat and be warm.” But the birds, fearful of such a huge being, could not trust his plan or follow his lead.

Then, caught by enthusiasm, the man thought: “If only I could become a bird! I could lead them easily. They would understand what I want of them; they would no longer be afraid.”

Suddenly, he came face to face with the meaning of Christmas, saying: “This is what God achieved through Jesus.” He realized by becoming human, the Father could have an intimate connection with those whom He loves—even to eat, laugh and dance with them. Most of all, He could teach them His ways and demonstrate His plan.

The simple story of a man who cared for birds displays the longing heart of the One who loves us. It was through sending Jesus that Father God could come to move, walk and talk revealing Himself and His great love.

He told us how to “come in out of the cold,” and enter the kingdom of warmth by giving up our fears, our need to control, our tendencies to manipulate, so that we can accept the righteousness, peace and Joy provided by His spirit. He came to bring us freedom. And He introduced us to the Father by saying, “Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father.”    

A few months ago, I prayed earnestly to receive a clear concept of this Father who loved us that much. I wanted to comprehend – if only to the smallest degree—something about his personality.

I began an exercise which powerfully opened my eyes. It is one anyone can try. Make a list of the people who have most inspired or helped you in life. The “heroes,” the teachers, closest friends who are vividly ensconced in your memory. Carefully identify the characteristics experienced with each one of these people.

Now, write the characteristics you saw in each one. This can form a portrait—a portrait of the Father, the one who created us. Each of the characteristics, each talent, gift and ability we admire or have benefited from within others was first a part of Him, imparted for the common good of all.

For me, two hours were spent, identifying all the characteristics and giftedness I have ever seen or heard of in any and all who came to mind while working steadily with pen and paper.

It is awesome, trying to envision One Being with all of these attributes while attempting to capture a glimpse of God, the Father of life and love. Imagine it: He is sincere, honest, stable, a master of excellence; He is creative, inventive, ingenuous and resourceful; He is fruitful, productive and diligent; He is enthusiastic, warm and caring; He is witty and musical—able to laugh and treasure intimate moments; He is supportive yet challenging—firm but fair; He is affirming, generous and winsome. These are surely only a few of God’s attributes.

Attempting glimpses of God, can bring the possibility of a new appreciation for every person we encounter. Each one who walks this earth, holds a bit of God’s Self waiting to be discovered. Finding these glimpses of God’s essence in others can become a testament of our His presence within each one of us. Of course, we are not God. Not perfect. Because of this, there are lots of opportunities to do the God-like thing: forgive and continue to love. Scripture declares we are made “in His own image.” We have the great quest of living up to what we know of God—and also through the “glimpses” gained through the people who surround us.

Many things spoke of the Power and Presence of God. The hardness of marble altars, stone floors and wooden pews spoke of strength. Then I looked at the people. They were soft. Vessels of earthen clay, yet filled with spirit.

Many shy away from being called “soft.” But the softness I saw was holy. That which makes us vulnerable, malleable and capable of love.

Back home this truth was clearly seen when I visited the home of friends who had just lost their 24-year-old son in death. Neighbors, family and friends from their parish came, some with arms loaded with food. Many offered prayers from caring hearts. And as they left each carried away a piece of the pain. So much pain to be borne there in that home. Yet the grieving family knew through the people that they would not be bearing this alone. The softness of human love was leaving its impact, as love in action extends strength.

At times like this we often feel inept. Words may seem inadequate. But what we do have to give is enough. That is empathy, wrapped in flesh. When we are weak, then we are strong. The Apostle Paul exhibited that throughout the letters he left for believers who would follow “the way,” which Christ revealed to him.

When we see a fellow human hurting, something incredible occurs. There is an urging within to stop—set aside what we are doing—and go. “Be there.” It is love in action, coming from the treasure of one’s heart. Tears convey release, as solace is received.  Such “holy water” grants clear vision that this love, as it flows from others, is a healing force.

We all endure grievous trials during this life? 1 Peter 1:7, portrays how it is through these hardships that our faith comes forth “much more precious than gold that is tested by fire.” So, there is a refinement process and if we yield ourselves to it, enrichment results. And, God is praised.

While alongside my friends, I saw no anger or resentment. No bitterness spouted, although these dear people had lost another son a mere 13 months before. God is their ally, not their foe. And because of this, peace reigns in their home. Philippians 4:7, refers to this as “a peace of God which passes all understanding that guards our hearts through Christ Jesus.”

So here we are as humans, ideally all “soft covers”—no “hardbacks.” Fragile, destined for much wear and tear. Yet durable beyond comprehension. Filled with strength, having quite enough to share.

People. Earth’s richest resource. Vessels deemed worthy by God to carry His love. A love experienced most vividly when seen flowing from one to another. Oh, holy ones of God, we belong to each other.

Thank God for our hearts of flesh, capable of expanding, stretching, growing—even at the risk of breaking. Yet it is in the breaking that we are formed afresh. As Christ’s body, broken in the Eucharist and given away for the nourishment of many, we live on loving life and one another. The “breakings” do come, challenging our souls and in the end, what is remembered is that faith does hold strong when we depend on the power of the Spirit. This is what makes us more than flesh . . . And able to live forever.

Years ago while driving down the road in my vintage wine-colored Monte Carlo—favorite of all my cars—I realized the meaning of “unconditional love.” At the time, I had been married to my husband Gary for 30 years. He is not one who easily says, “I love you.” Yet, he is one who shows it throughout every avenue of our lives.

As a child, my parents’ love was never spoken—yet shown through the ways family needs were provided: the roof over head, food on the table, clothing and supplies for school. Yet, I did not hear, “I love you” from parents striving to make ends meet. Instead, I learned I had “better behave.” The importance of gaining my parent’s good pleasure became eminently important to me. So, doing all possible to gain it, was my childhood quest. The message, “Love will always be here for you,” was not perceived by me.  No. The message that stuck was all about chores, being smart—getting good grades–and behaving. “You had better not mess up!” was the major message.

I did grow into loving, more than fearing, my parents as an adult. But, as a kid, I held more fear of them than any other emotion. Maybe this is normal for a lot of people. Or, maybe most children are hugged daily and told, “I love you.” We only know our own experience.

Finding love of any kind in life’s journey is the highest of all quests, finding unconditional love is a pinnacle that I dare to say few truly reach.

Our early experiences within childhood, are brought into our marriages. In my first marriage at age 17, right out of high school, the honeymoon was short. It was however, a brief experience of being adored. Whoa. That was a first. Yet, within only a number of days, I knew the hand of authority was back. The old fear of not being enough or good enough was fully felt. This lasted eight years . . . eight years of figuring out that living in constant fear was no way to live. So, the only healthy choice was to leave. The soul ripping process of divorce became inevitable for the sake of safety and sanity.

Four years later, I started dating Gary, I knew he was different from any one I had ever met, yet my early programming was so linked to “pleasing” others that I had an unspoken fear of “when is the heavy hand going to come down on my back.” Yet, that never happened. Still, that inner angst was there… expecting the worst. So, that day after 30 years of marriage, while driving down the road, I realized something about God that was actually happening in my life: unconditional love! Who knew it existed—and is real?  Finding it in a human form through Gary, allowed me to comprehend the magnanimous love that He has for us. I remember the day so clearly, while driving, when the realization came: Gary only saw me as good. My flaws, well—flaws happen. He looked beyond those. Then, I remembered something my father said after having a dream.

Dad experienced a scar-filled childhood. He, too, feared his father throughout life and was sure “that guy” would not be in heaven. Although, during his later years my grandfather had changed and was in church every Sunday.

As my father was nearing death he shared a dream in which his mother and father  were walking arm-in-arm into a huge banquet room—in heaven. He knew it was heaven, but he couldn’t believe his Dad was there. Then, within the dream Dad heard these words, “I only see the good.” Voila! Here is love—unconditional love. And, this is the message God has for us.

And, this is the truest and greatest gift of Christmas. God looked past the sin, the brokenness of this world, and sent His Son to save us from ourselves. Left alone, there would be no eternity with God for any one of us. But, Jesus came to us, knowing He would shed His blood to cover the tab for our mis-steppings, and all the grossness that comes through the human race’s self-importance and self-adoration. Now, through Him, God sees “price paid” as He cherishes His children. It is the all-pervading, all accepting love of God that has provided this truth for God’s children: He only sees the good!

Here is an amazing truth from John 1:5, 12, “The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it.” Now, for verse 12 of John 1, “But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name.”

What a difference it makes to grasp this truth. For, it is the truth of God’s unconditional love that empowers and impassions those He calls—and we know when that call comes!

I would like to suggest a gift that we could give to ourselves with no cash lay out. No monthly payments hazarding 2021. Living in the now could be one of the greatest gifts ever received. It is something we alone can give to ourselves. And, doing so will benefit everyone around us. (Even God and the neighbors.)

Notice how ”the now” is where children live. Given the passing of time, most of us adults have forgotten how to do that. Life finds us letting that go. As adults, we are habitually inclined to press toward tomorrow, next week, or what we can make happen years from now. Yet, the habit of favoring elusive tomorrows with fervor and anticipation robs our todays.

When we are not projecting our thoughts into the future, we regress into the past. But what of “this moment”—as living is best done in the now.

Some hold a rather fatalistic view of the future, as Matthew Prior wrote in Human Life, “What trifling coil do we poor mortals keep; Wake, eat and drink, evacuate, and sleep.” Yet, life is so much more.  A 16^th century monk said it best: “Not where I live do I breath, but where I love.”

The Bible says we carry a precious treasure within these “earthen vessels.” This takes pondering to perceive the truth of it.

Jesus spoke of the Kingdom of God being within us, righteousness (right doing), peace and joy in the Holy Spirit, as Romans 14:17 explains.

It seems the glory of God is most fully seen in us humans when we are daily submitting ourselves to the essence of that spiritual kingdom. This exemplifies enjoying the now. 

Of course, living in the now, does not always mean our experiences will be joyous. There are other emotions to be lived—and when we are honoring and identifying them, hard as they may be, at times, we are truly alive as we work through them.

Notice what happens when we are stopped in the present, prevented from rushing into the future? This can bring discomfort to our busy days. We can get “antsy” while waiting in line at the supermarket or waiting in the doctor’s office. What’s it like when brought to a halt in heavy traffic? Could this be a time to hum a tune, sing a song, or visit a favorite memory lived out with a loved one?

Why is it that we so often seem unable to receive these moments as gift? These times can be used for seeing more fully what is around us, even to notice people in more depth, here and there. Sending a blessing their way. Why not send them some love? We have a lot to give, right?

Rather than to rush past this truth in our hurry to grab the next moment, let’s stop to ponder the length and depths of what we are doing with our lives. This can show us our true heart’s desire. And, within the process of this exploration, we are living into the present moment.

 In a way, we are all “one”–all breathing the same air, most likely each of us are waiting to be set free of “the wait.” Do we really want to plunge into future moments, skipping the now? How about savoring each day that nourishes the soul.

We had three sons, Ted, Tim and Todd. When one of them would bicker with another, I would make him stop and think. At times, when one failed to share a goodie treat, I’d say, “Look closely at your brother. He has a tongue and a taster, too!” This worked, serving to make the little “perp” think beyond himself and remember that sharing is loving.

Surely, each of us shares a certain poverty. Not one of us can be certain of a tomorrow, a next year, or even the “next moment.”  We have this moment—tis all.

Do we love ourselves enough to live into this gift of “the now?”

I can’t help but think of my husband, Gary, who married me with three little boys to raise, ages 4, 7 and 9. Sure, he fell in love with me, but also he was a handsome guy with a good job as a ticket agent for Greyhound Bus Lines. There were women he may have preferred, but he chose me, one who had come out of a great struggle from a calamitous marriage, with hundreds of dollars still owed to her lawyer. He opted to come alongside me in life, making sure I, with my sons, had a nice home with everything we needed to help a family do well. He gave himself to us, out of love, yes, but he stepped in not knowing how it would all come down. He was, and is, my knight in shining armor—with amour in his heart. God saw it and blessed him. And, blessed us. As Christmas approaches, it is especially grand as we were married on Christmas Day and are about to have our 54^th anniversary. (Our “living room” marriage took place while Gary was on a brief Christmas leave from the Navy Seabees.)

Because of Gary’s sacrificial love, I could now know “our” family would be OK!

Early in our marriage. I experienced a sudden, life threatening illness—taking me right up to heaven’s gate. Yet, a risky surgery brought me back. Gary was beside my hospital bed for hours each day, then home taking care of the needs of three little boys. While spending much recuperation time in bed, I discovered that journaling, prayer and dream work were of great help as I sought healing. Consequently, these practices, coupled with studying the Bible, have continued throughout life.

Dreams can be teachers. A recent dream portrayed elements that show up within the lives of people who “truly live.” The dream infers that the “giving” we do in life will majorly influence what takes place once we reach the eternal realms of heaven.

Prior to this point in life, I’ve come to believe life is all about “how” we love . . . and that the more we love in this life the more we are like our Creator. Within last night’s dream another piece is added. The pictures and symbols portrayed that there is a very different “end result” in the next life when we give strictly from the heart, versus having an ulterior motive of gaining worth, needing something back, or giving out of fear of being “dissed if we don’t.”

This will be surprising to us in the next life, as we may not expect what comes. 1st Corinthians 3:9-14, came to me immediately after the dream, which speaks of us being “co-workers in God’s service . . .” Verse 12, says, “If anyone builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay or straw, ¹³ their work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each person’s work.¹⁴ If what has been built survives, the builder will receive a reward.” Wow! There will be a fire—to put our works to the test!

The dream showed how giving of ourselves and our abilities—not to be seen or admired, nor to gain power or appreciation—and not out of fear of any kind . . . but simply out of love, can never be destroyed. This is a giving that will STAND the heat of fire once our earthly lessons are over. I saw clearly in the dream that only what we have done on earth out of love will matter. And, speaking of the rewards, these will be empowerments. After the dream it was easy to believe our rewards will fortify and increase our natural abilities, expanding these magnificently throughout eternity. New, enriched understanding of all we have learned while here on earth will be ours. It brings joy to imagine what all may be ahead for us.

Thanks be to God for the gift of life and love—and thanks for the memories.