By Chaplain Joy Le Page Smith, MA, BCC

Recently a fellow chaplain told of her growing edge, admitting how bothered she can get at other drivers on the road. She said, “I don’t know why people ignore signs—or at times even the lights!” I noticed the intensity of this kind woman’s voice and realized her as a kindred spirit. We both fill our lives with doing what we can to help others know they are loved by God within their illnesses, and/or deaths. We shared the truth that sometimes we need support in our own growth processes.

Many years ago while in a growth group talking about ways to improve ourselves, the subject of our road experiences came up. I blurted out this admission, “If you see me on the road, just pull over and pray!” That was a great group. We laughed a lot within these conversations.

My chaplain friend and I admit that driving still finds us fuming on occasions at least momentarily. And, as we talked further it was evident we both have recently decided to care more for other drivers, and to pray for them, while sensing that old feeling of “hot under the collar.” Sometimes it helps to pray that “certain drivers” will get well deserved tickets before hurting themselves or others. Some people learn this way.

Growing in patience is challenging, yet it clearly leads to an Excellency within spiritual growth toward which many of us continually seek to advance.

Galatians 5:22-24, is pertinent, here. “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. And those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.”

Once I prayed for patience—and only once. It seemed God was happy to answer that prayer … as He knows how much easier life will be as we work on gaining patience (self-control, even longsuffering). Then several “new” challenges came soon after, that seemed consequential.  So, that prayer calls for added spiritual gumption.

Gradually, we learn in life that God is love and one of His greatest gifts to us comes through our caring deeply for our “neighbors–even our anonymous neighbors next to us in cars. While growing in our ability to love we become empowered to gain the nine fruits of the Spirit shown above.

For sure, we will not always remember to be kind, caring and patient—and forgiving–while driving the roads. Still, let’s not stop trying. Every day is a new beginning. As Thomas H Palmer (1840), put it, “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.”

I recently took a new tack for being patient while on the road. I asked God to help me become a dedicated driver. Being a dedicated driver will see me choosing as I put the key in the ignition to be “good as gold” while at the wheel . . . able to momentarily shift gears–out of judgement of others–into self-control. My hope these days is to always care about what other drivers may be going through in their lives while asking God to help them discover that they are loved and with prayer everything can turn out for the good as they place their trust in Him.

About the author: Joy Le Page Smith is a Board certified clinical chaplain. Her articles and blogs are read in 32 countries. Joy’s four books are available on her home page at Healing-with-Joy.com where readers can view–FREE–her children’s book titled, The Little Mountain Goat Who Was Afraid of High Places.

By Chaplain Joy Le Page Smith, MA

Life is full of irritations, large and small. People and circumstances can aggravate, and sometimes frustrate us. We would not be human otherwise. Yet our responses have lasting effects.

This is best seen in the lowly oyster. When a foreign body like a grain of sand, an undeveloped egg or a parasite finds its way into the oyster’s shell a secretion is stimulated. Layer upon layer of this material called “mother of pearl,” coats the invader eventually creating a beautiful gem.

Since ancient times, pearls have been considered to be among the most precious gem. This is probably the reason the word “pearl” is used metaphorically for anything of great value, particularly in the scriptures.
Truth be told, we have continual opportunities to make “pearls” by coating our “irritants” through seeking to be patient with people and situations. Recovery, even from the hardest of circumstances, comes through forgiveness and prayer.

When a personal relationship goes awry the temptation is to reject the person, isolating our self from him or her. Yet, Jesus teaches a better way, instructing us to communicate, reaching change when this can be done . . . while forgiving what hurts and accepting what cannot be changed.

Have you noticed how making a decision to forgive is not a onetime occurrence? The memory of the smarting offense returns again and again. But, by continually reminding ourselves that we have forgiven and by praying often for ourselves and the offenders, we make gems out of what otherwise would remain as sharp irritants, ever present to annoy. The choice is ours.

We do not have the power to do this in our own strength. It takes grace—a grace that God can give making it possible to forgive and to continue to love. The way we gain that grace comes most easily through finding time to be with God in prayer.

Jesus routinely left the crowds and sought isolated spots where He could enjoy conversing with His Father. The results are recorded for all to read … a trail of gems. He was empowered to embrace the rebuffs and other hardships within His earthly ministry. How? By continually reaching out in forgiveness and love – all the way to the cross.

Next week Lent begins. For those who observe Lent, the six weeks prior to Easter Sunday are spent reflecting more deeply on who Jesus is and what He accomplished on our behalf’s. It becomes a sacred part of the year, with time set aside to be alone with God. It is a time during which ideally, our dedication to Christ is deepened. This may mean getting up a half hour or an hour earlier than usual, or taking time in the evening in a place where quietude can be found.

Jesus asked this of His disciples, “Come aside by yourselves to a deserted place and rest a while” (Mark 6:31a).

In the quiet moments while reading God’s Word and listening to Him speak deep within, we find strength, purpose and guidance. We find grace—“mother of pearl”— for the making of gems. Pearls . . . appropriate gifts for Christ, the King of all who seek to live His teachings.

About the author: Joy Le Page Smith is a Board certified clinical chaplain. Her articles and blogs are read in 32 countries. Joy’s four books are available on her home page at Healing-with-Joy.com where readers can view her children’s book titled, The Little Mountain Goat Who Was Afraid of High Places. For another opportunity to read this author’s writings go to Healingwithjoy.blogspot.com