By Chaplain Joy Le Page Smith

Have you ever trusted someone–thought they were your friend only to receive a dreadful blow as a result? Many of us, probably the majority of us in varying degrees, have been deeply hurt by another… maybe by a former spouse, or an abuser who took us by surprise and made our world seem much less safe.

God never asks anything of us unless it is for our good, our growth and enhancement in preparation for the larger picture– say eternity. “You have heard it said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies,” (Jesus in Matthew 5: 43-45). Wow! Imagine it! Such a tall order. Yet, we can succeed at “letting it go” by setting our wills to forgive that person (as many times as it takes). Otherwise, this matter can lie on our souls like battery acid. Therefore, the inability to let a matter go will continue to hurt us deeply.

So how do we “love our enemies?” The mere thought of “that individual” can be painful. Well, Jesus said to pray for them. I did this in two very hurtful situations within my life and found I did not think of it as “loving” those two persons, but that action no doubt was seen as being loving in God’s sight. That act of setting my will to “let God be God,” as per my being harmed, then to pray for my enemy to change—actually changed me—by giving me a sense of freedom.

Believe me, that effort took a lot of work to bring me to the place where I could genuinely pray for the souls of those two. This was not easy or short-lived. However my determination to pray for them to reconsider their behaviors—for the sake of others as well as for their eternal good–worked wonders. I could finally let go of the hurt. This brought strength to me once it was fully worked through.

You might ask, “How can I do that? I was brutally harmed?” With God’s help we can do anything. And we cannot hide from ourselves, saying “It doesn’t matter.” It does greatly matter to our souls! Being honest with how deeply we were hurt is vitally important. Telling our story to a counselor, a pastor, a priest or a rabbi is vitally important as well. This helps us to shove it up and out of our souls… given time, we can let it go.

The saying “let go and let God,” truly helps us realize that we cannot change what happened and we cannot change anyone. But God can.

Forgiveness helped me to keep telling myself that God was with me and kept me alive. Being alive is a very great gift… having the ability to finish my growth, becoming who I could grow into being is priceless.

Old memories do arise. They come back. I use a visualization that shows me kicking that memory (not the person) in the hinney, seeing the memory fly out of my mind. The unconscious mind is where healing is needed. That is the part of one’s mind that responds to the images we give it. On the other hand, our minds give us pictures through dreams, mental images and sometimes visions.

Taking the path of becoming all God knew we could be when we were first conceived opens the door to becoming a “magnificent me.” Yes, it works to think highly of ourselves. It supports our being as wholesome as we can be.

Try it. You will like it!

Joy Le Page Smith, MA, is a Board-Certified Clinical Chaplain. Her two websites are reaching readers in up to 77 countries. They carry many helpful articles addressing life’s difficulties:  Healingwithjoy.blogspot.com or, Healing-with-Joy.com 

Be sure to check out Joy’schildren’s video FREE. 

By Chaplain Joy Le Page Smith, MA

Everybody knows you can’t pick a handful of huckleberries in less than a second. Right? Wrong ….

My husband, Gary, and I spent a lazy week in McCall, Idaho, one summer. There in that beautiful, restful setting I spent the one hint of ambition I had “huckleberrying” (a verb long known to natives). The berries are sparse and tiny. Heaven alone knows the ups and downs of bending and picking. But I kept thinking of each one of these little suckers as a tiny burst of flavor—and how they would make tomorrow’s pancakes a memorable taste treat.

By the time we had picked for two hours my back was talking and mosquito bites itching, I begged to quit. Gary’s reply trailed in from higher on the hill, “I’ll be finished with this patch in a minute.”

I had visions of plunging into the lake; his visions were of a pie. Now, a pie takes at least four cups of berries, not to mention considerable work and firing up the wood-burning oven in our rustic lakeside cabin. This was my vacation, after all.

Picking berries can get old, causing the mind to wander. In the quiet beauty of the woods it wasn’t long before I was thinking of God’s great extravaganza. Among these towering pines pockets of water are cradled by mountains. Wildflowers in violet, yellow and blue speak volumes while whispers of breeze caress us, the berry-pickers.

God spared no effort with His creations, right down to the little huckleberry waiting to be plucked—tiny, easy to overlook. Yet, each holds a savory burst of yum.

There seems to be a parallel here. With close to 7.8 billion human beings on the earth it seems incredible that the individual has importance. But like the little huckleberry, each has flavor. Some are bitter; some are sweet; some are sour and some are salty.

Salty! Wasn’t that what Jesus called his followers? As we talk and talk with God our hearts become sweet. Yet He pegs us as salt . . . a common substance, invaluable for preserving and purifying—while also serving as a seasoning.

How sweet it would have been had God said, “You’re my little huckleberries.” But he didn’t. He said, “You are the salt of the earth.” Salt. It almost takes a grimace to say the word. And—whoa! He says, “You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt loses its flavor, how shall it be seasoned? It is then good for nothing but to be thrown out and trampled underfoot by men,” (Matthew 5:13-16).

Sometimes we don’t act like salt, but more like the huckleberry—an exotic little temptress or tempter, easily crushed, staining and tainting, capable of drawing a lot of attention to ourselves.

On the other hand, how challenging it is to be “salt. A preserving, refining, flavorful agent in our own corner of the world.

Meanwhile, back at McCall. Finished with berry picking and headed for “home’s” front door, I heard Gary yell, “Hey, you!”

I turn in time to see a little guy not more than two feet tall making away with a fist full of huckleberries. He had reached deep into Gary’s bucket. Berries tumbled through his little fingers, falling all around his feet.

“Do you know it took hours to pick those?” Gary squalled. The child looks up with innocence as he hurriedly pokes more berries into his mouth. Laughter did follow our shock, but inwardly we begrudged this little guy every berry he took!

A handful of huckleberries in less than a second! Yes, it is possible. But only if you are a sneaky little snitch lying in wait for a weary-eyed, plodding plucker . . . with visions of huckleberries, albeit, now a cup shy of a full pie.

About the author: Joy Le Page Smith is a Board certified clinical chaplain. Her articles and blogs are read in 32 countries. Joy’s four books are available on her home page at Healing-with-Joy.com where readers can view her children’s book titled, The Little Mountain Goat Who Was Afraid of High Places. For another opportunity to read this author’s writings go to Healingwithjoy.blogspot.com